‘Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret’ Updated For Adult Women Who Frequently Change Birth Control, by Ginny Hogan
Are you there god? It’s me, Margaret. I go by Mags now. Last time we chatted, I had just gotten my period. A lot has happened since. I’m 26 now, but my body is still going through continual changes. It all started in college. When I was 21, my boyfriend Damien said, “Do I really [&... [Read More]
Essential Advice for Your First Party, by Matt Corluka
If you’re here, in my class, then you already know my story. Until I was 21, I’d never been to a party. And then everything changed. I went to a party, I learned the tricks, and yes, it was the first and last time I felt alive. Let’s begin. Congratulations! You’ve been invite... [Read More]
Long Works of Literature Made Shorter—and Better—with the Addition of Dinosaurs, by Matthew David Brozik
Atlas Shrugged “Who is John Galt?” The light was ebbing, and Eddie Willers could not distinguish the bum’s face. The bum had said it simply, without expression. But from the sunset far at the end of the street, yellow glints caught his eyes, and the eyes looked straight at Eddie Wi... [Read More]
I Am Gareth the Bold, and I Fear No Confrontation, by Graham Techler
I’m going to stop you right there, and it won’t throw me one bit. I ordered this meal with the Dressing of a Thousand Islands and this is plainly ungarnished. You’ll have to send it back, and I don’t even mind saying so, for I am Gareth... [Read More]
Odysseus Reviews the New Translation of ‘The Odyssey,’ by Michael Maiello
“Tell me about a complicated man,” begins Emily Wilson’s translation of The Odyssey, which is the story of me, Odysseus. I read this and thought, “This woman really gets me.” Finally, after thousands of years, my story will be told in a way that doesn&rsq... [Read More]
Odysseus Reviews the New Translation of ‘The Odyssey,’ by Michael Maiello
“Tell me about a complicated man,” begins Emily Wilson’s translation of The Odyssey, which is the story of me, Odysseus. I read this and thought, “This woman really gets me.” Finally, after thousands of years, my story will be told in a way that doesn&rsq... [Read More]
Cute and Unlikely Human Companions, by Ralph Gamelli
Stepping out her door, Helen Malloy was completely unprepared for what she saw. There on the front yard, her husband Gus—famous for angrily warning kids away from his beloved lawn—was playing baseball catch with a ten-year-old boy from the neighborhood. Stunned, she took o... [Read More]
Men Find Me Intimidating Just Because I’m a Sentient Robot Sent Here From the Future to Destroy John Connor, by Erica Lies
When I first arrived at these time-vector coordinates to stalk and kill John Connor, future leader of the human resistance, I didn’t realize just how hard dating in 2018 would be for a futuristic annihilation machine. As a T1000 Terminator programmed to identify as a heteronormative cis female... [Read More]
Winter Blues Band for Hire, by Bizzy Coy
Dear Nightclub Booker, Hi. I’m Dugan Rathbone, guitarist and lead vocalist for Doctor Sad Man’s Sad Time Jam Band, the nation’s only winter blues band. That’s right, our quartet makes your favorite blues tunes even bluer thanks to our debilitating case of seasonal affective d... [Read More]
Winter Blues Band for Hire, by Bizzy Coy
Dear Nightclub Booker, Hi. I’m Dugan Rathbone, guitarist and lead vocalist for Doctor Sad Man’s Sad Time Jam Band, the nation’s only winter blues band. That’s right, our quartet makes your favorite blues tunes even bluer thanks to our debilitating case of seasonal affective d... [Read More]