Tweet More or Eat Sh*t, Because I’m Roidin’ Up This Zoo’s Social Media Strategy, by Cara Michelle Smith 
Welcome to Hell, nimrods. This is your last day as employees of the Cincinnati Zoo and your first day as global brand ambassadors of a 1,200-horsepower content generating machine best known for the absolute truckload of baby panda videos and giraffe GIFs it churns out on an hour-by-hour basis. Under... [Read More]
Tweet More or Eat Sh*t, Because I’m Roidin’ Up This Zoo’s Social Media Strategy, by Cara Michelle Smith 
Welcome to Hell, nimrods. This is your last day as employees of the Cincinnati Zoo and your first day as global brand ambassadors of a 1,200-horsepower content generating machine best known for the absolute truckload of baby panda videos and giraffe GIFs it churns out on an hour-by-hour basis. Under... [Read More]
Welcome to Our Extremely Tasteful, Dangerously Haunted Dream Home, by Lillian Stone and Topher Cusumano
You are cordially invited to an elegant housewarming function at the home of Colette and Tad Newman this Saturday. Address: 666 Hemlock Craven Point Attire: Cocktail (crucifix accessories recommended) Note: In lieu of a traditional housewarming gift, please bring a small offering of tatted lace or b... [Read More]
Welcome to Our Extremely Tasteful, Dangerously Haunted Dream Home, by Lillian Stone and Topher Cusumano
You are cordially invited to an elegant housewarming function at the home of Colette and Tad Newman this Saturday. Address: 666 Hemlock Craven Point Attire: Cocktail (crucifix accessories recommended) Note: In lieu of a traditional housewarming gift, please bring a small offering of tatted lace or b... [Read More]
How I Bought a House at 25 by Saving Up and Also Being the Daughter of the Man Who Invented Houses, by Sarah James
As a millennial, I’m so frustrated when I see my peers complaining about their circumstances. The idea that my generation is entirely helpless victims to a failed economy is simply untrue. Look at my own story: Even though I’m only 25, I was recently able to purchase my first house throu... [Read More]
‘Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret’ Updated For Adult Women Who Frequently Change Birth Control, by Ginny Hogan
Are you there god? It’s me, Margaret. I go by Mags now. Last time we chatted, I had just gotten my period. A lot has happened since. I’m 26 now, but my body is still going through continual changes. It all started in college. When I was 21, my boyfriend Damien said, “Do I really [&... [Read More]
Essential Advice for Your First Party, by Matt Corluka
If you’re here, in my class, then you already know my story. Until I was 21, I’d never been to a party. And then everything changed. I went to a party, I learned the tricks, and yes, it was the first and last time I felt alive. Let’s begin. Congratulations! You’ve been invite... [Read More]
Long Works of Literature Made Shorter—and Better—with the Addition of Dinosaurs, by Matthew David Brozik
Atlas Shrugged “Who is John Galt?” The light was ebbing, and Eddie Willers could not distinguish the bum’s face. The bum had said it simply, without expression. But from the sunset far at the end of the street, yellow glints caught his eyes, and the eyes looked straight at Eddie Wi... [Read More]
I Am Gareth the Bold, and I Fear No Confrontation, by Graham Techler
I’m going to stop you right there, and it won’t throw me one bit. I ordered this meal with the Dressing of a Thousand Islands and this is plainly ungarnished. You’ll have to send it back, and I don’t even mind saying so, for I am Gareth... [Read More]
Odysseus Reviews the New Translation of ‘The Odyssey,’ by Michael Maiello
“Tell me about a complicated man,” begins Emily Wilson’s translation of The Odyssey, which is the story of me, Odysseus. I read this and thought, “This woman really gets me.” Finally, after thousands of years, my story will be told in a way that doesn&rsq... [Read More]